I Guess I Should Explain Myself.....
 

Hello Everyone :)

1st off, I'm basically fine. (and thanks to those that contacted me over the last few days)

I'm not going to bore everyone with all the details, so I'll just say that this time of year has been getting me down more & more each year, since 2001. Too many people that should be here are not :(

So, my mood, along with my chronic back pain, well, I work as much as I can, which means that some things get put off til I can squeeze them in.

But, I am still working, updating the Link Lists, building free sites, etc. It's just that it's taking me longer & longer to do these things. But please, keep submitting :)

I'm going to try to get here more often, so please just bare with me |shake|

Personally I can't wait for January 2nd and the holidays being officially over.

Do what you have to do Greenie. It's a hard fact that the older you get the more people in your life disappear. Nothing we can do about it. Over the years I've managed to focus on the people that are still here rather than feeling bad about the ones that have left us. But that's different for everybody ofcourse.

Hang in there |fonz|

Just so you know that I'm not being unsympathetic. My mom died Christmas morning. I don't remember when my father died as I try not to remember the bad stuff in life, but for my Christmas just brings back memories of watching my mother take her last breaths.

At least I'm not alone this year but being broke in a time when all we see and hear about is buying gifts just makes me want to rip Santa's head off.

Understood. |thumb

Let's hope that the x-mas times will help you to regenerate a little. Also good to know that the link lists are working in a regular way. |greenguy|

I know this time of year is tough on ya plus throw in your back pain and you should be happy to just get out of bed.

As Fonz stated, the older we get the more people we loose. I clearly remember when my grandparents retired they moved to a retirement community in another state. After 7 years they sold and moved back because all their friends there were dying and it was depressing so they wanted to be closer to "younger" family. Seeing family weekly helped offset the sadness of frequently loosing friends.

Now to get away from all this sadness I say:

Toughen Up Cupcake |smooch|
If ya need anything you know how to reach me

I feel ya Greenie! Sucks about your back, I'd be takin it slow too. The holidays can be tough financially and emotionally.

With a couple families and step-families to visit in a short time frame. Difficult to get everything done.

I have kids now.. so it's happy happy face ;)

no explanation needed Greenie..

I too have severe back pain and spend alot of time lying down or sleeping when I have things to do. I just plain sucks.

Because of metal in my face I can't do the MRI. But x-ray and cat scan and alot of head scratching. |banghead||banghead| They know part is arthritis and the worst is between L4 and L5 but because of trying to compensate for the pain much of my back continues to get worse and because of the way I have to sleep my neck is having problems as well.

Hang in there brother. Do what you can do, just make sure you take care of you.

I always enjoyed talking to ya back in the day and still do. If there is anything I can do to help please let me know.

We all have a quite big "suitcase of pain" ... The best way I found to continue smilling is to concentrate on making the others happy, especially on giving kids their best Xmas ever !
Give yourself away to forget your heart !

1st off, a bunch of |smooch|'s and |shake|'s to all of you! As simple as it may be, sometimes just reading some words from friends make things a little bit better :)

And I do understand that, the older you get, the more loved ones you lose. I can almost deal with those. It's the handful of people that were taken from us WAY TOO SOON that get me down :(

I hear ya Greenie, keep strong!

And re Christmas, if I ever get divorced it will probably be because of Christmas. I'm just fucking tired of arguing every fucking year about the amount of money my wife spends on Christmas.

I just wanted you to hear it again |smooch|

There is no answer to that. But the last thing they would want is for you to ruin your days mourning them. Instead, remember them with love, make a toast to "Absent Friends" and then try to live your life as they would want you to live it. Try to be happy for their sake, as well as your own. I know it is hard, but it is what they would want.

OK mushy bit over, tomorrow I start ragging on you again!

I|greenheart|ecchi

We should compare notes on the back pain thing sometime. I have a long loooong history of back problems stemming back to the 70's when I had a major spinal surgery at the ripe old age of 16. Got me about 20 good years but in the last 15 years or so things have really started to go downhill for me.

So I hear you on that.

There may be some things we can discuss though, and possibly a few things that might help you out even. Shoot me a message when you get the chance.

All the best to you "Green One", been a while since I checked in here.

Hope everyone had some smiles and joy this holiday season.

Chronic pain sucks. It gets us down in ways that "medicine" can't measure or even really treat very well. All you can do is what works for you. If it is keeping to your own schedule and doing what you can do well, then stick with it until the pain eases off. Don't add stress to the pain.

One other thing that may well be contributing is the amount of sunlight and vitamin D3 you are getting. When I first moved to Finland after living in Texas, I about went nuts. Mid-December is our darkest time, and we get less than 6 hours a day of sunlight (if it can break through the clouds). Dark and gloomy doesn't begin to describe it. Today was also cold and rainy. I now have a daylight bulb in my worklight and have been taking 20,000 micrograms of D3 every day. My mood this year is better than the last 2. I am a bit more focused and my short term memory is better.

There are several people in my life that should also be here but are not for one reason or another. I do miss them very much, but there isn't anything I can do to bring them back or I would. We went to the local cemetery on Christmas Eve Eve and lit candles for my husband's family buried there, and those that are buried elsewhere. The entire graveyard was so beautiful and peaceful. Focusing on the gifts they gave us while they were here does help a tiny bit. It does suck to get older, too.

Here's hoping it gets better this next year...

NO SHIT!!:D

I've been taking 4-6000 IU of Vitamin D3 for the last few months. I did notice a change when I 1st started taking it, but not so-much now :(

Hence the reason for my absence again for the last few days :(

Greeny.... trust me I know how you feel. I miss MML... I miss WillieB... a lot has changed..... My wife passed in 2004. seems like yesterday. rock on my friend