DOJ to Issue New Definition of Producer
 

Leaked from a top DOJ official today is this proposed new definition by Gonzales of producer.

I could not confirm this with the DOJ so I think it is somewhat speculative.

A] person, including any individual, corporation, or other organization, who is a primary producer or a secondary producer.

(1) A primary producer is any person who actually films, videotapes, or photographs a visual depiction of actual sexually explicit conduct.

(2) A secondary producer is any person who produces, assembles, manufactures, publishes, duplicates, reproduces, or reissues a book, magazine, periodical, film, videotape, or other matter intended for commercial distribution that contains a visual depiction of actual sexually explicit conduct.

(3) The same person may be both a primary and a secondary producer.

(4) Persons excempt from the definition of producer (secondary or primary):

(i) Persons that are not excempt from the Geneva Convention (please see Attorney General Gonzales advisory paper to the white house for details), however you must register as an enemy combatant

(ii) If your yearly contributions (legal or otherwise) to any republican candidate are greater than the current median income for the United States and its territories (please see part 5 below)

(iii) Any activity, other than those activities identified in paragraphs ©(1) and (2) of this section, that does not involve the hiring, contracting for, managing, or otherwise arranging for the participation of the depicted performers

(5) If you meet the condition of part 4 section i and if your yearly income is within the top 1 percent of incomes in the United States and its terrortories then you may be eligible for the following:
(a) if you provide porn to the country of Iraq and/or to the service men and women there, you may be eligible for
financial assistance under the current Rebuild Iraq legislation,
to find out if you qualify under this section please contact Dick Cheney and have your check book ready

LOL It looks almost real if you dont read it lol.

love that.. ROFL

"you must register as an enemy combatant"

HAHAHAHAHA nice!

Classic, truly classic |headbang|

LOL Excellent! |bow|

Hahaha anyone not reading the entire thing would think it was real without a doubt.