[Toby]

#1 - B
If you don't have specific plans on who you want to see and what you want to do while in Vegas you'd be wasting your money at this point.

#2 - A & B
A - You don't need to spend a huge amount of time building hosted galleries. Don't try to compete with the large corporate sponsors with new custom graphics for every gallery. Come up with a nice template or two, and reuse them. Let the content be the star (aka YOU). Add a few new hosted galleries every two or three months and email your affiliates when you do so.
B - This is still a good idea even if you do have quite a few FHG's. TGP submitters can't use hosted galleries, and not all TGP owners are going to sign up for your program. I have this kind of arrangement with a number of sites like yours. It's nice to be able to submit galleries with content I know the TGP reviewer hasn't seen submitted before.

#3 - B
This seems to be, based on your comment, what you feel comfortable with, and the site is about YOU. Your tour should be representative of what is inside the member area. If you have hardcore content, you can show it on the tour discretely, without showing a Hustler style centerfold.

All the above aside, until you get your tour issues sorted out it's all pointless. Until you have a tour that converts well you are throwing away traffic and $$$. The advice given by others about your tour is a good start. Slick graphics and fancy Flash pages look nice, but are difficult to navigate and difficult to update.