I'm in the joke telling mood

Sarah_Jayne · 2005-05-31, 04:47 AM

I'm in the need of a little kick up the ass this morning as I am about to embark in making a list of every site, gallery,etc I have ever done and can still find on the web. So, I am spending the next few minutes giggling so when I am crying later I can have fond memories of the giggles.

So - a joke for all that need it this morning:

A repairman is walking through a mental institution.

He comes up to the first room and sees a man swinging an imaginary
baseball bat.

"What the hell are you doing?" he asks.

"I'm Babe Ruth. As soon as I hit a homerun I'm out of here," replies
the man.

The repairman wishes him well and continues on his way.

In the next room, there's a guy swinging an imaginary golf club.

"What the hell are YOU doing?" he asks. "I'm Arnold Palmer.

As soon as I make a hole in one I'm out of here!" replies the man.

The repairman shakes his head and comes up to the next room.

There's a guy sitting naked balancing a peanut on the tip of his
dick.

"What the hell are you doing!" he asks.

"I'm fucking nuts, I'm never getting out of here!

Sinistress · 2005-05-31, 05:48 AM

LOL Cute...
Best of luck with the list building Sarah

Sinistress · 2005-05-31, 05:52 AM

Here's the best joke I have -ever- seen/read/heard

Upgrading to Wife 1.0

Last year a friend of mine upgraded from Girlfriend 4.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog leaving few system resources for other applications. He is also now noticing the Wife 1.0 is also spawning Child-processes which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomenon was included in the product documentation, though other users have informed me that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application.

Not only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself so that it is always launched at system initialization where it can monitor all other system activity. Some applications such as PokerNite 10.3 , Bachelor Party 2.5, and Pubnite 7.0 are no longer able to run on the system at all, causing the system to lockup when launched (even though the apps worked fine before).

Wife 1.0 provides no installation options. Thus, the installation of undesired plug-ins such as Mother-in-law 55.8 and the Brother-in-law Beta is unavoidable. Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day.

Some features my friend would like to see in the upcoming Wife 2.0:
A "don't remind me again" button.
Minimize button.
Ability to delete the "headache" file
An install feature that provides an option to uninstall 2.0 version without loss loss of other system resources.
An option to run the network driver in "promiscuous mode" allowing the the system's Hardware Probe feature to be much more useful/effective.

I myself wish I had decided to avoid all of the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by sticking with Girlfriend 3.0. Even here, however, I have found many problems. Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 4.0 on top of girlfriend 3.0. You must uninstall Girlfriend 3.0 first, otherwise the two versions of Girlfriend will have conflicts over shared use of the I/O port. Other users have told me that this is a long-standing problem that I should have been aware of. Guess that explains what happened to versions 1 and 2.

To make matters worse, the uninstall program for Girlfriend 3.0 doesn't work very well, leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system. Another identified problem is that all versions of Girlfriend have annoying little messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0!
VIRUS ALERT

All users should be aware that Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Once that happens, Mistress 1.1 won't install and you will get an "insufficient resources" error message. To avoid the aforementioned bug, try installing Mistress 1.1 on a different system and "never" run any file transfer applications(such as Laplink) between the two systems.

FYI: Don't even think about a shared directory!!!!!!!!!

spookyx · 2005-05-31, 07:21 AM

that was a good one

BigVikingAl · 2005-05-31, 09:27 AM

Nice one sarah.

sue-fl · 2005-05-31, 10:55 AM

Great joke Sarah........LMAO

Sarah_Jayne · 2005-05-31, 12:39 PM

*comes up for air*

thanks

One domain down..15 or so more to go..can't wait until i get to the ones with galleries on them.

kaylacruz · 2005-06-02, 12:22 AM

nice i needed a laugh!

petite2 · 2005-06-02, 06:28 AM

hahaha. Thanks for the laughs Sarah!!!

wildgirl · 2005-06-02, 11:18 AM

hahaha, great joke nice one sarah!

2005-05-31, 04:47 AM	#1
Sarah_Jayne I hustle for Hustler Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Los Angeles, California Posts: 526	I'm in the joke telling mood I'm in the need of a little kick up the ass this morning as I am about to embark in making a list of every site, gallery,etc I have ever done and can still find on the web. So, I am spending the next few minutes giggling so when I am crying later I can have fond memories of the giggles. So - a joke for all that need it this morning: A repairman is walking through a mental institution. He comes up to the first room and sees a man swinging an imaginary baseball bat. "What the hell are you doing?" he asks. "I'm Babe Ruth. As soon as I hit a homerun I'm out of here," replies the man. The repairman wishes him well and continues on his way. In the next room, there's a guy swinging an imaginary golf club. "What the hell are YOU doing?" he asks. "I'm Arnold Palmer. As soon as I make a hole in one I'm out of here!" replies the man. The repairman shakes his head and comes up to the next room. There's a guy sitting naked balancing a peanut on the tip of his dick. "What the hell are you doing!" he asks. "I'm fucking nuts, I'm never getting out of here! __________________ HustlerCash.com Affiliate Manager ICQ: 232834291 \| Skype: sjayne76

2005-05-31, 05:48 AM	#2
Sinistress Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand! Join Date: May 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 97	LOL Cute... Best of luck with the list building Sarah __________________

2005-05-31, 05:52 AM	#3
Sinistress Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand! Join Date: May 2004 Location: Canada Posts: 97	Here's the best joke I have -ever- seen/read/heard Upgrading to Wife 1.0 Last year a friend of mine upgraded from Girlfriend 4.0 to Wife 1.0 and found that it's a memory hog leaving few system resources for other applications. He is also now noticing the Wife 1.0 is also spawning Child-processes which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomenon was included in the product documentation, though other users have informed me that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application. Not only that, Wife 1.0 installs itself so that it is always launched at system initialization where it can monitor all other system activity. Some applications such as PokerNite 10.3 , Bachelor Party 2.5, and Pubnite 7.0 are no longer able to run on the system at all, causing the system to lockup when launched (even though the apps worked fine before). Wife 1.0 provides no installation options. Thus, the installation of undesired plug-ins such as Mother-in-law 55.8 and the Brother-in-law Beta is unavoidable. Also, system performance seems to diminish with each passing day. Some features my friend would like to see in the upcoming Wife 2.0: A "don't remind me again" button. Minimize button. Ability to delete the "headache" file An install feature that provides an option to uninstall 2.0 version without loss loss of other system resources. An option to run the network driver in "promiscuous mode" allowing the the system's Hardware Probe feature to be much more useful/effective. I myself wish I had decided to avoid all of the headaches associated with Wife 1.0 by sticking with Girlfriend 3.0. Even here, however, I have found many problems. Apparently you cannot install Girlfriend 4.0 on top of girlfriend 3.0. You must uninstall Girlfriend 3.0 first, otherwise the two versions of Girlfriend will have conflicts over shared use of the I/O port. Other users have told me that this is a long-standing problem that I should have been aware of. Guess that explains what happened to versions 1 and 2. To make matters worse, the uninstall program for Girlfriend 3.0 doesn't work very well, leaving undesirable traces of the application in the system. Another identified problem is that all versions of Girlfriend have annoying little messages about the advantages of upgrading to Wife 1.0! VIRUS ALERT All users should be aware that Wife 1.0 has an undocumented bug. If you try to install Mistress 1.1 before uninstalling Wife 1.0, Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before doing the uninstall itself. Once that happens, Mistress 1.1 won't install and you will get an "insufficient resources" error message. To avoid the aforementioned bug, try installing Mistress 1.1 on a different system and "never" run any file transfer applications(such as Laplink) between the two systems. FYI: Don't even think about a shared directory!!!!!!!!! __________________

2005-05-31, 12:39 PM	#7
Sarah_Jayne I hustle for Hustler Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Los Angeles, California Posts: 526	comes up for air thanks One domain down..15 or so more to go..can't wait until i get to the ones with galleries on them. __________________ HustlerCash.com Affiliate Manager ICQ: 232834291 \| Skype: sjayne76

2005-06-02, 12:22 AM	#8
kaylacruz Internet! Is that thing still around? Join Date: May 2005 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 7	nice i needed a laugh! __________________ Kayla http://www.kaylacruz.com http://www.kaylacruz.com/webmasters/index.php

2005-05-31, 07:21 AM	#4
spookyx Kodak Ghosts Run Amok Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Hobbs End Posts: 1,718	that was a good one

2005-05-31, 09:27 AM	#5
BigVikingAl They have the Internet on computers, now? Join Date: Apr 2005 Posts: 148	Nice one sarah.

2005-05-31, 10:55 AM	#6
sue-fl You can now put whatever you want in this space :) Join Date: May 2005 Location: Florida Posts: 2,837	Great joke Sarah........LMAO

2005-06-02, 06:28 AM	#9
petite2 Rock stars ... is there anything they don't know? Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 12	hahaha. Thanks for the laughs Sarah!!! __________________ Please Re-Read The Rules For Sig Files

2005-06-02, 11:18 AM	#10
wildgirl You can now put whatever you want in this space :) Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 624	hahaha, great joke nice one sarah! __________________ My Best Money Maker: