Finally Friday Again...Good Morning

[Jim]

Morning
It's Friday and my wife is up early for our annual chili cook off This is the first one that I was invited to as a celebrity amateur I am up against local celebrities like the TV weather guy, the local morning radio show host and a couple of mayors. My lawyer is on the committee and got me invited It just looks funny to see my name as a "celebrity amateur chief" It is this Sunday so wish us luck Not that we will need it..I swear the other guys open a few cans of Hormel and try to pass that off.

Have a good day

[lorsha]

Few more inches of lake effect, but no biggie. Going to take a day off and play some Vanguard SOH today online. Have a great day everyone!

[Fonz]

Morning all,

Good luck with the chili cook off Jim, has it been a year already?

In a few hours me and 15 friends of mine are heading to Stuveltje's country to spend the weekend there (in Arcen if anybody must know). So it will be a pornless weekend, at least online, for me.

Have a nice day all.

[JackDaniel's]

Good Morning Everyone

[terry]

Good Morning Everyone!

Is it already time for the cook off.. good luck Jim!

A little more snow fell overnight and a little more expected sometime today.. and still it remains VERY cold!

Have a good one!

[Cleo]

Just another day to do errands, the gym, and make the porn for the horny masses.

What day of the week is it again?

[docholly]

Morning..

74 here today..
Need shower before swap
hope all who are sick are feeling better
Jim.. good luck in the chili cookoff--may the judges tongues savor your tasty morsels before the fire flies out their arse.

have a good one-- make lotza money!!

[ponygirl]

good morning everyone

wow the week goes fast! lots of snow coming down today, guess we're paying for all that nice weather we got in Dec. oh well, spring can't be too far away, can it??

hope you all have a great day!

[Greenguy]

Originally Posted by Jim

...It just looks funny to see my name as a "celebrity amateur chief" ...

Local Pornographer Wins Chili Cookoff...Film At 11.

Good Friday Peoples

It's a balmy 16° here today - not a lot of new snow, but the wind is picking up, which makes it look like it's snowing. There's some nice drifts forming on the roof of my house (had to use a poll to dig out the 2 feet of snow that was covering my XM antenna yesterday)

I should actually have my stats posted sometime today - just in time for people to print them up & read them on the shitter after a night of drinking

[spookyx]

good morning everyone! Good luck on the cookoff Jim

[MrMaryLou]

Good Morning All and good luck with the contest Jim

[MrYum]

Morning all!

Good luck with the chili Jim...be sure to add extra farts

Finally saw the doc yesterday...turns out my head cold had morphed into a full on sinus infection. Some $14/pill antibiotics should have me back to my abnormal self soon, but already feeling much better

Have a lucrative day everyone

[Jim]

Thanks guys
I really have no doubt that we will win the amateur part unless the other amateurs decide to really make chili this time. But the real goal is the pro-am cookoff next month. Beating the restaurants will be cool and if we do win, we will be off to the Central New York cookoff...and then, off to state

[sue-fl]

Morning!

Best of luck Jim with your Chili

Poor MrYum hope the pills work fast!

I will be at the Medicaid office all day raising hell! My son's medicine is now 6grand a week and they think he doesn't need medical help

Have a great weekend all I sure plan to if I don't get arrested first

[stuveltje]

goodmorning all yes i am in a good mood , chili....i never have eaten it, i also dont believe we have that here in restaurants or so, but i have promise myself to make the meal chili one time.

In a few hours me and 15 friends of mine are heading to Stuveltje's country to spend the weekend there (in Arcen if anybody must know). So it will be a pornless weekend, at least online, for me.

Ah going to visite our "special coffeeshops" Fonz

Today i am gonna focus on my hubbies puter again, he still cant get on the internet and him hanging around me in weekend drives me nuts, so i need to fix that.

Further i am not doing much, i wont cook but i ordered some nice shiskabab (or whatever you name that) and spareribs, always nice you can find some restaurants who will deliver food at your doorstep in a stupid moron town (the one i live). So have a great day all and make some money or whatever!

[Ramster]

Good Morning from Toronto. Heading to the Raptors/Lakers game tonight then home tomorrow finally.

Have a good one.

[cd34]

I thought I read somewhere that it was Tuesday. Or at least it was February 2.

Quite a bit on the agenda. It would have been helpful if it was Tuesday. Could have dealt with more time this week.

[Toby]

Mornin' y'all,

What a co-inky-dink, chili on the menu here today too, although not for competion coming up during rodeo. Hey Jim, perhaps you'd care to be a guest judge?

For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is. They actually have a Chilli Cook-off about the time the Rodeo comes to town. It takes up a major portion of the parking lot at the Astrodome.

The notes are from an inexperienced Chili taster named Frank, who was visiting Texas from the East Coast. He said "Recently, I was honoured to be selected as a judge at a chilli cook-off. The Judge #3 called in sick at the last moment and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted." (Remember Judge # 3 is Frank!!)

Here are the scorecards from the event:

Chili # 1 (Mike's Maniac Mobster Monster Chili)

Judge # 1 A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.

Judge # 2 Nice, smooth tomato flavour. Very mild.

Judge # 3 Holy shit, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flamesout. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

Chili # 2 (Arthur's Afterburner Chili)

Judge # 1 Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

Judge # 2 Exciting BBQ flavour, needs more peppers to be taken seriously.

Judge # 3 Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure
what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich manoeuvre. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

Chili # 3 (Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chili)

Judge # 1 Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick. Needs more beans.

Judge # 2 A beanless chili, a bit salty, good use of peppers.

Judge # 3 Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get me more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting shit-faced from all of the beer!

Chili # 4 (Bubba's Black Magic)

Judge # 1 Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.

Judge # 2 Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or other mild foods, not much of a chili.

Judge # 3 I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb bitch is starting to look HOT... just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chili an aphrodisiac?

Chili # 5 (Linda's Legal Lip Remover)

Judge # 1 Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground,adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

Judge # 2 Chili using shredded beef could use more tomato. Must admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

Judge # 3 My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm burning my lips off. It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop screaming. Screw those rednecks.

Chili # 6 (Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety)

Judge # 1 Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of spices and peppers.

Judge # 2 The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and garlic. Superb.

Judge # 3 I shit myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that slut Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my ass with a snow cone.

Chili # 7 (Susan's Screaming Sensation Chili)

Judge # 1 A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.

Judge # 2 Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of chili peppers at the last moment. I should take note that I am worried about Judge #3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing uncontrollably.

Judge # 3 You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like shit to match my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch hole in my stomach.

Chili # 8 (Tommy's Toe-Nail Curling Chili)

Judge # 1 The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.

Judge # 2 This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself. Not sure if he's going to make it. Poor dude. Wonder how he'd have reacted to really hot chili?

is on, help yourself...

[bDok]

top the morning to you all.

good luck on the chili cookoff.

Time to knock out some work then get ready to go out.

Off to a birthday party dinner downtown tonight and then group of us have a table at a club to continue the fiesta. The weekend has landed.

[SheepGuy]

LOL Toby!
That is the funniest shit I've read in a long long time
Reminds of my Jamaican buddy Rudy's hot sauce. He brings it with him whenever he goes for wings. He'll order kamikaze suicide extra hot sauce and try it with a couple, not hot enough for him so out comes his hot sauce.
I tried it once, on one wing, it hurt me so bad I was crying and I swear that sauce burned my fingers. The mans digestive system is entirely asbestos

[Revshare-Omar]

Got here kind of late, but mid day from Atlanta!!