How do I deal with Acacia?!

[Useless]

After receiving my Final Notice from Acacia, I've decided this:

I am the sole patent holder for nudity. Yes, just general nudity. Not only do I want royalties paid for all photographed and video taped nudity, but I also wish to be paid each time anyone finds themselves in the state of nudity, whether a camera is present or not. I expect to be paid double if you are naked while reading this.

If anyone would like to avoid the eventual lawsuit, I suggest you go ahead and start sending me money now. Cash only please.

Also, is it possible to say, "Final Notice of Introductory Royalty Rates"? I mean, if it is INTRODUCTORY, how the hell can it be FINAL? Please explain - In three words or less. Acacia may have good attorneys, but their proofreader sucks.