Tips And Tricks
 

I am about to leave but wanted to ask all the gurus out there weather they are html, search engine, php, htaccess...etc to think of some good tips and tricks. I have literally sent out over 1000 tips and tricks since 1997 and they are getting harder and harder to come up with.

If you have a good one, send them to me at webmaster@greenguysboard.com

You will get full credit and so will your site. :)

" watch out where the huskys go, and don't you eat that yellow snow".

:-)

Alex

If it smells foul down there you probably should move on to another mate.

Don't eat the green fish they taste bitter.

No need to backup as it is always easier to do the second and third time around.

When trying to please the Cleo creature remember that she prefers chocolate and shopping over sex.


|buddy|

A computer can make as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working for 20 years. |goodnight

or

When in charge, ponder. (2) When in trouble, delegate. (3) When in doubt, mumble. |rasta|

or

If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in. |lightsabe

1 - Put 20 wasps in an empty cigar tube.

2 - Put the lid on and shake.

3 - Voila! Handy instant vibrator which never need batteries.

|jester|

A new niche is born wasps porn ????? |bananna| |bananna| |bananna|

MrMaryLou you have a pm |waves|

LOL Jeremy.. :D

DD

I'm about to post 2 questions covering these topics, so whoever comes up with a good answer can get into the "Hall of Fame" and Newsletter Header - LOL

I still prefer chocolate and shopping over 20 wasps in an empty cigar tube. :D

LMAO -

Somehow I don't think these are the tips Jim is looking for |jester|

hmm tips....

1) swing away on a 3-0 pitch

2) it's not paranoia if they ARE all after you

3) take Cleo shopping FOR chocolate

Avoid losing contact lenses by drilling a small hole in each one and attaching them with a length of nylon fishing line.

Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand closer to the object you wish to view.


:D

DD

Old telephone books make ideal personal address books.
Simply cross out the names and addresses of people you
don't know.

Before attempting to remove stubborn stains from a
garment, always circle the stain in permanent ink pen
so that when you remove the garment from the washing
machine, you can easily locate the area of the stain
and check that it has gone.

Avoid parking tickets by leaving your windshield
wipers turned to fast wipe whenever you leave your car
parked illegally.

I have no real tips or tricks to offer because I seem to do everything the hard way. If anyone has a tip for finding time to incorporate existing tips and tricks into one's work routine and overcoming all those bad habits so that one HAS more time... I'd like to hear it.

If I had a sharper axe I could cut down the trees faster, but I'm too busy cutting down trees to sharpen my axe.

well when I want a company to deliver or install something that they dont normally deliver/install

I ask if their buisness is handicaped accessible then
I tell them that I am in a wheel chair and cannot go there to pick it up and can not install it

Like when we changed over to digital cable
(dont tell accicia)
the cable comapny wanted me to drop off our boxes

I told them that it was to much of a hassle because I was confined to a wheel chair

and Voila the cable guy was here a few days later hooking it up

it works for all sorts of stuff

Open your command prompt in windows...

C:\

and type in....

Edited by urb..... because it really wasn't that funny.

|jester|

Seriously.... here is my pet hate.

onmouseover="window.status='http://www.sponsorcode.com';return true" onmouseout="self.status='';return true"

A real URL in the status bar has a forward slash after the ".com" like this.....

onmouseover="window.status='http://www.sponsorcode.com/';return true" onmouseout="self.status='';return true"

:)

Also, if you place this into the head of a page.....



those pesky IE image toolbars will not show up when someone mouses over your images. Especially useful when doing a tour, when you don't want distractions appearing on screen.

My pet hate of mousovers is when they put something in the onmouseout part.

I get this all the time,
onmouseover="window.status='http://www.sponsorcode.com/';return true" onmouseout="self.status=' ';return true"

They have told the status bar to display " " instead of returning it to its default state. Nothing goes between the quotes, no spaces, no words nothing. Putting noting between the quotes returns the status bar to its default state.

Yeah their actually is a reason that we use the onmouseout part of the code and it is to return the status bar to its default state, not to have it display a bunch of spaces down there. Some, not all, browsers display information down there unless someone has told it to display something else down there.


;)

|jester| you guys are too funny...LMAO


Tip: if you have to fly in coach, always fly in the last 3 rows, they have the greatest survival rate. If you are 1st class, you are drunk anyway so you won't care.

Trix: Easiest ones are found on 23rd and 10th.. Best ones are on 5th and 59th but they are way more expensive.

have a GREAT morning!!

Another Tip is to read this web site http://www.anybrowser.org/campaign/

Especially if you slice and dice your images.

if you are feeling sinister
Go off and see a minister
He'll try in vain to take away the pain of being a hopeless unbeliever

|buddy|

Every man has a plan that won't work.

If you have to shoot a mime, use a silencer.

The other line is faster.

You just knew it.

Call 911. Make a cop cum.

|jester|

Tip

Rotate your tips and tricks... |jester|