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Plateman,
That text on the top of your site needs to be looked at... Yes you do need to gain the surfers trust, gain their confidence and make them feel at home... to do that you need to get a "personality" for your site. You also need to think... that text on that page is what the search engines are going to be eating up, so think about what keywords you want to target there.. are using them!?
so my advise is...
Have a personality... you will get bookmarkers!
Have keyword content... you will get Search engine traffic.
But you need to look at both seriously
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