Warbot, if I know a LL is going to send me lots of traffic, I'll make allowances for rules like that. If it's a new or small LL, they're dreaming
I've taken recips out then put them back in lots of times, don't be afraid to shake it up a bit & experiment with what works.
Also, some really good traffic senders take a long time to list you, I know a couple where it's been like 3-6 months! Then you just have to figure out if the traffic spike is worth it (ie: is it productive) and decide if you want to keep subbing.
I think if you build nice sites that follow the rules and look good, a LL should list you regardless of who's on the recip table (within reason - there are lots of dead lists out there too)