The following plagiarized from a Mac board without permission in keeping with the traditions of Microsoft.
MICROSOFT TO BUY MICROSOFT
April 1, 2004
Redmond, WA - Sources have revealed that Microsoft, the world's largest software company and makers of the ubiquitous Windows operating systems, is planning to acquire itself.
"The technology sector is extremely competitve nowadays," said founder Bill Gates. "We have concluded that the only way for Microsoft to maintain its competitiveness in the Windows marketspace in the future is for Microsoft to purchase Microsoft outright."
CEO Steve Ballmer added "This purchase further ensures that our customers will continue to receive the level of innovation, software quality, service and support they have always received from Microsoft."
The acquisition is pending federal governmental review and agreement on the definition of the term 'metamonopoly.'
