Some of my favorite dumping lines...

[Surfn]

All my Ex's need not reply

I need more time and more space. That's why I'm moving 12 hours and 7 states away. Yeah sure I'll call you ...the minute I get there.


Dear Baby: Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: YOU


All my friends at the gay bar said I should go through with the sex change, what do you think?


The mothership has returned and I must leave. Pay no attention to my android double when you see it.


You've become so incredibly unattractive during these last few minutes, that I don't want to invest any more time trying to have sex with you.


Sorry, but my leprosy is acting up again. Are you going to eat those fries?


Oh, hi Julie...erm...Amanda? Judy? Oh, I remember now, its Cindy, right? Tanya? Does it start with a 'T'?


I'm awfully sorry, but I have asexual tendencies...


(for Simon) Would you like to meet my last girlfriend? Really, its no problem, she's still chained up in my basement.


I have a zillion more but I don't ant to bore you too much. lol