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[furrygirl]

Juggernaut, I can't even figure out what your point is, other than that you believe in hitting children and you will never ever wear a condom.

Originally Posted by juggernaut

Let me ask you something. Do you use condoms? Do you practice safe sex?

My argument has never been that all porn has to include condoms, but for some reason, I've said that like 4 times and no one has actually read it yet.

Both of my male partners (I'm polyamorous) and I have made the decisions, after a period of time where we were using condoms, to be fluid-bonded and stop using condoms between us. We get STI screenings, and I'm on the pill. Because of the level of responsibility inherent to maintaining an open relationship, we all trust each other to not be engaging in higher-risk sexual acts without condoms when it comes to other people. For the three of us, this level "safer sex" works, even though there are *always* risks.

I firmly believe in people choosing their own level of sexual risks, so long as they are making informed decisions based on knowledge of how to properly use contraceptives (for heterosex) and safer sex barrier methods (like condoms, dams, and gloves), and their and their partner's STI stats to the best of their abilities. (Meaning, knowing that testing can have inaccurate results or their partner could have picked up something recently that is not showing up.) I personally think that many people in this world engage in sexual conduct don't qualify on one or both of those counts. That's not a "judgement", but not everyone is going to go down to the Planned Parenthood with every person they want to bang and then wait a couple of weeks for result, and repeat in 6 months to see how things look.

So, back in the world of one-nighters and infrequent STI screens, I do believe firmly in safer sex. If I were to bring home with some random dude tomorrow, I'd get a rubber on him before his pants hit the floor. I'm a realistic person, and in the real world of non-committed hookups, condoms get my absolute endorsement.

Originally Posted by juggernaut

I have never ever heard anyone say condoms are ineffective. I have heard people say the only way to be 99% sure you won't catch anything is by not having sexual contact at all, but never that a condom is ineffective. Maybe they’re telling you that in Washington state but then again, I don't know. Last time I was there the people seemed smarter then that.

Anti-sex brainwashing programs in public schools greatly play up how ineffective and useless condoms are. If I had more time, I would do some research for direct quotes, but I don't think you're that interested. The goal of "modern" "sex ed" is essentially to tell teens that having premarital sex will seriously scar them for life, that there are deadly diseases out there, that everything is just to frightening and morally wrong, and that birth control and condoms aren't terribly effective at all (as a part of the whole scare-tactic theme). Oh, and that all those supposedly problems are magically solved once you say, "I do", because, you know, no one has ever had an unhappy marriage.

I was doing some reading on one of SIECUS's sites, so here's their page about your so-much-more-enlightened New Jersey: http://www.ncsse.org/mandates/NJ.html There's some good news with Trenton, the school board actually shot down some abstinence-only speakers. But, look at these excepts on Newark:

Public high schools in Newark, New Jersey are scheduled to begin teaching an abstinence-only-until-marriage program called The Choice Game, created by the Several Sources Foundation, a faith-based organization that opposes abortion rights.

The classes in Newark's public schools will not mention contraception or condoms, although condom usage is discussed briefly in another class taught by a different teacher.

Newark has one of the highest rates for teen births and sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) in New Jersey.

I'm not saying that any US state is really any better, but sheesh, New Jersey is hardly the glass house from which to insinuate that other people backwards hicks in the sex ed department.

If you're looking for a longer read than those representative little snippets, try SIECUS's booklet about scare tactics and sex ed: http://www.siecus.org/pubs/tsha_scaredchaste.pdf You could even print it out and read it on the can!

One of the sex ed programs used in schools that I've had a chance to read parts of is Sex Respect. From the student FAQ on their site:

Are you telling us that sex is bad?
No, sexual love is something too good to be spoiled by misuse. Marriage is the only relationship that can secure its meaning. I’m talking about love, not uncommitted sexual activity. Sex is a privilege, not a right. If we misuse it by treating it as our right, in premarital or even extramarital relationships, we then suffer terrible costs–physical, emotional and psychological damage.

...

The anxiety of getting pregnant or catching a sexual transmitted disease can lead to depression. Some 400,000 teens annually have abortions, a source of depression, even suicide.

Am I the only one who is seriously disturbed that young people are being taught that by having sex outside marriage, they "suffer terrible costs–physical, emotional and psychological damage" to such an extent that they might kill themselves? It makes me sick to see such true meanness fed to people, especially impressionable young folk, and it's so sad how few people have even the slightest idea what is being taught in US schools these days.

So please, don't try and argue with me about what you "assume" is being taught in public schools, because you're not going to win. I keep up on all sorts of sexual matters as best as my time allows- be it a cute new butt plug or what Miers thought of Griswold V Connecticut. (She'd never heard of the case, BTW!)

This is just some of the context where my statements throughout this thread are coming from. There really isn't much "sex education" apart from porn sites this days, which is quite unfortunate, considering the "educational" value of so much of the junk out there. Sure, there are some awesome parents, committed non-profits like http://www.scarleteen.com, and politically active groups working to establish a better sense of sexual education and access to sexual healthcare for people of all ages, but for the rest, there's PORN. For that and other reasons, I will always argue that it's unfortunate to see that the direction so many porn people push for is to see how much more violent, degrading, inaccurate, and simply stupid they can make their content.

Believe me, *I* don't want the collective "you people" to be America's sex educators anymore than you do! But, it remains: people look at us to figure out how to fuck and get new sexual ideas for what they want to try, for better or worse. So pretty please, let's not knock condoms quite so quickly, and let's give Cooless a nice supportive hand in tapping a new and interesting niche that could make sales for himself and all the delightful sponsors out there.