Just a heads up

[stuveltje]

butt thats not the only issue bugging me, why the heck ,that woman tells us one month later that my hubbies dad has a heart problem, that makes me just as pissed this time, it took me 2 years to find out that both my parents have brains issues, my dad have got 2 ...how you name it...small brain attacks ( vains explode in your brain) he never told me also not my mom, but i knew....i knew, but here is the issue, last summer i walked into the summerhome of my parents with both of my kids (my parents have a summerhome near by mine) i walked in, i saw my mom knock out on the sofa and my dad with a white face, my kids where with me, i asked my dad what the fuck is going on, he said" your mom didnt feel well and fall down" i said why the fuck didnt you call the doc, he didnt answer me, so i did, that time i found out both my parents have a "vain in their brain issue" sounds funny, but i asked my dad why didnt you tell me????? the same i ask the new wife of my fatherinlaw why she didnt tell us he had a heart problem, isnt it wise to tell your kids what is going on, maybe they wanna prevent their kids from worriing, but hell i like to know all, because the brain issue my parents have ...the doc told me i will have the same, i would like to know what my hubby is dealing with, he has to know and i told him, its not sure i get it, but the chance i get it is big, but we dont deal with that know, now my dad understand why i didnt allow my kids to get in the boat with him at the summerhome, he didnt tell me but i figured out something was wrong and i didnt wanted to take the chance my kids came in a situation their granddad got an attack and they had to deal with it themself, i also asked him why the fuck you didnt tell, he didnt want us to worrie, i said wrong thinking, because you didnt tell i made my own conclusion, i said but telling us, would be better then we know what to deal with when something happens.............parents

[stuveltje]

btw that will make you think, all on my fam side had brain issues, my aunt, age 42, my mom and dad at the age, mom 52 dad 48, now my parents are 54 i am 38 my aunt died age 48 brain issue...nice thinking for me..........btw this all makes me depressed again and that i wanna prevent, i am going to bed.......thinking again, soon i will be back again...in a positieve way

[ar-melody]

Best of luck with everthing, hope it all works out for you!

[spookyx]

Stu, giant whale sized hugs to you

[stuveltje]

like the moron and stubburn person i am....yes i started an argument last sunday with the inlaws.......and i told them they can jump high, i will tell some brothers and sisters i have contact with that their dad is very sick and in hospital.............ofcourse the bla bla and the nag nag and who the fuck i thought i was, but then they forget, my kids see their grandkids they are at the same school, i see their other kids, i cant keep it a fucking secret and i was fucking right, i told sunday eve one sisterinlaw about her dad, she contacted the rest and 6 of the 8 brothers and sisters where the same eve in hospital, i did a good thing, specially because today the docs decide to stop my fatherinlaws heart pumping for a minute ( oke i dont know if i say it right, but hell lett me spill my emotions here) they did that to see if they would manage to get the heart in a right rythme again, well i can tell you that minute took almost a year for us, but after a minute they started the heart again and till this moment his heart is pumping the right way.....pfffffffffffffffffff, not done all yet, they still keep an eye on him and on the fluids behind his lungs and he has some vains in his legs which are full with shit and he need surgery for that, but that he cnt handle now, his heart pumped 130 times a minute in rest before they stopped his heart and now his heart beats 90 times a minute so that is good, i have a little faith again, still it takes alot of our energy...........mmmmm this was nice to post on the board, thats why i like boards, i can yell, nag, cry and be happy on boards

[Thomas]

Well done telling them and really good news!

/Thomas

Originally Posted by stuveltje

like the moron and stubburn person i am....yes i started an argument last sunday with the inlaws.......and i told them they can jump high, i will tell some brothers and sisters i have contact with that their dad is very sick and in hospital.............ofcourse the bla bla and the nag nag and who the fuck i thought i was, but then they forget, my kids see their grandkids they are at the same school, i see their other kids, i cant keep it a fucking secret and i was fucking right, i told sunday eve one sisterinlaw about her dad, she contacted the rest and 6 of the 8 brothers and sisters where the same eve in hospital, i did a good thing, specially because today the docs decide to stop my fatherinlaws heart pumping for a minute ( oke i dont know if i say it right, but hell lett me spill my emotions here) they did that to see if they would manage to get the heart in a right rythme again, well i can tell you that minute took almost a year for us, but after a minute they started the heart again and till this moment his heart is pumping the right way.....pfffffffffffffffffff, not done all yet, they still keep an eye on him and on the fluids behind his lungs and he has some vains in his legs which are full with shit and he need surgery for that, but that he cnt handle now, his heart pumped 130 times a minute in rest before they stopped his heart and now his heart beats 90 times a minute so that is good, i have a little faith again, still it takes alot of our energy...........mmmmm this was nice to post on the board, thats why i like boards, i can yell, nag, cry and be happy on boards

[Fonz]

Damn Stu, sorry to hear about all of this. If there's anything I can do just let me know and if you need someone to spill your guts out to in Dutch just hit me up.
Best of luck to you and your family.

[stuveltje]

Originally Posted by Fonz

Damn Stu, sorry to hear about all of this. If there's anything I can do just let me know and if you need someone to spill your guts out to in Dutch just hit me up.
Best of luck to you and your family.

thanks fonz, maar ik geloof niet dat je wilt horen hoe ik kan schelden in het nederlands nu
i have an headeach...never thought how my life would be messed up like this, suddenly i dont know how to handle all, fam life, kids, bizz, sicknes and the stress...thats life heay, still i received a special pm this eve....a pm from physio, you know (well some will know) a german guy i took under my wings and lett me down ones, after that time i took him back under my wings and lett me down again,even the guy started to earn good money with my help, he sended me an pm this eve after a couple of years disapearing just like that, he apoligize to me ..........all i could say when i readed his pm was "wow" hell i never expected an pm from a guy who disapeared years ago and got me in some trouble to focus on the domains he used on my name and the hosting and checking all his sites, still i have respect for that, he told in his pm he finally got the balls to pm me, i am over my anger for that, it was some time ago, still a pitty he didnt push thru, he could have made something here, i blame it on his age, he was to young, to many things to get distracted at and he started college again that time, and school is important, so a couple of years later he pmd me, i will accept his sorry ( or how the hell you write that) i am already glad he is still alive ( yeah yeah i have some weakness for the guy). still i was very happy with his message this eve, its the first positieve thing in my life since the last weeks!

[physio]

stuveltje pm'd me that it might not be too bad to post my pm to her here as well. i dont know, it almost seems a little personal and all but she was some sort of my mentor and i cant explain how much she helped me when i was in this biz.

so this is not only an apology to stuveltje but also to all the good folks from this board that listed tons and tons of my free sites that had to be removed and changed because of the mistakes i made in life.

---------snip---------
hello stuveltje,

this is something i wanted to do for a long time and it seems i finally grew the balls to do it. i cant even remember when and how it happened that you helped me get started in the adult business, that you gave a total stranger that you knew nothing about access to your server and gave him the opportunity to pursue a work that was otherwise impossible to do.

i did a little work here and there, but then i let you down. that was for the first time. after that you took me back and helped me again and again you let me use your hosting and helped me with my sites. it has been so long ago, i dont even know anymore what and how it happened that you took me back without hesitation.

after finishing school and before going to college i wanted to try and stay home for 6 months - be a full time webmaster. as we both now know, i failed - as i always do. i dont know if its in my personality or something but its just what i do. i start something or say i will do something and then (even if its going well) i mess up and just stop working on it.

the second time i messed up i do remember. it was in the fall/winter of 2004 - man, in august i made almost 1000 dollar - it was going great. i wanted to make 1 free site a day and build my own linklist, really get going. you got me my own hosting and all was going great. and then it happened again, i just stopped working - started to watch stupid tv series and played computer games. why? i dont know. i was on the way to be making good money, i just needed to keep working. but i didnt.

in december i started to play world of warcraft - and i can admit now that i got addicted to this f*ing computergame. you wrote me emails, forum posts and icq messages. and that is another thing i did at that time. if there was a problem or i was ashamed of myself i just ignored it. did i see your messages? yes. but i ignored them and there is no reason why i would do it, but i did.

i'm not writing this because i want your help again. i just wanted to say sorry to someone that helped me (a total stranger) twice and was let down by me twice. you have been more than good to me and i ignored you, even though you were just worried about me. like i said before, i have had this on my mind for a long time. you have been a good friend and business partner - for treating that friendship and the business we had together so bad i wanted to apologize.

i'm in college now, the first year was kind of messed up because of me playing too much computer games and not going to class. but i'm working on my grades now and hope all goes well in the next 2 years.

i hope you are well

physio
----------snap-----------

[stuveltje]

Physio, you dont know how much respect you get from me to post the message in public, yes you have to have some balls for that and you did it, i told you i will accept your aplogy (damn i cant even write that word) and yeah i wish you didnt fuck up that time, but it has happen and its past time, i hope you do well in college and drop the damn netgames, i know you have alot of good things in you, so focus on what you are good at and i hope college will be easy for you, you know how bizz works, so maybe one time in furture we will meet again, good luck at college

Stu

[stuveltje]

*signnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn* my so called friend, realy fucked up, even my greenguyandjim news emails get in my spam box, i am realy having an hart time to find out the good emails, the good thing is i found a female friend to help me out, i knew it would be better to get a female friend involved she does my stuf already for more then a week and she is on top what my male friend didnt do, to much porn for him probably, bare me to all waiting for an answer, we try to do all..........