Monday 22nd September And Ecchi Is Back - So everyone Should Rejoice!

[ecchi]

I'm back from my holidays, did you miss me?
(I'm making a note of the names of everyone who said "no".)

I joke a lot about Wales, but have not been there since I was a young man, so I assume my jokes are just sightly racist humour. However now I've been there again I realise how true they are.

Wales is a land of small villages, hills, mountains, and forest. (At least North Wales. The south, I believe, is more developed.) If it were a location in an American movie it would be for a film full of banjo players strumming the tune "duelling banjos" and inbred nutters in pig masks with chainsaws. In reality, it ain't much different from that image.

First three days eating in the local pub (bar). The atmosphere was weird. There was an episode of "Torchwood" where they team were investigating an isolated village in Wales and the locals turned out to be cannibals. This pub had a similar feel.

We then changed to eating in a bar in a hotel. The hotel was a big old building on the side of a hill, very "Gothic Horror" in appearance. but inside...

Well, we should probably have been warned by the fact that chickens were running loose in the car park, and the fact that there was a guy hanging round who looked like the village psychopath. Inside there were no customers, the landlord greeted us like long lost friends. They only had larger on the pumps, and when we asked if they had any bitter he replied "Yes, but only if you know how to connect up the barrels!" It turned out that, although he owned the place he had no idea how to make the beer come out of the barrels! There were a couple of other people in the building, not bar customers, not staff, also obviously not guests, and also not his family. No idea who they were, they just seemed to be people who hung about there. He asked them if they knew, none of them did. In the end he and I went into the hotel's cellar and fiddled about with the equipment until we managed to get bitter flowing up the pipes to the bar!

Then we got to ordering food. He had no menus, he simply asked "What would you like?" Eventually we decided on steaks, and when he served them he sat down at our table (uninvited) and chatted as though we were old friends.

The atmosphere was weird, the decor was a bit odd, and it was not until the following day when I realised what it reminded me of. Ever read "The Fall Of The House Of Usher"? Well it was a bit like the first few days in the castle in that book. Or - A European horror movie I saw once, where a doctor arrives to work at a mental asylum where (unknown to him) the lunatics have murdered the staff and taken their place.

Weird and disturbing.

However the most embarrassing part of the holiday is that we spent most of the week walking in the hills (Wales is mostly hills, and those bits that are not hills are mountains). Because my kidneys are fucked, they fill my lungs with fluid and I have to take pills to drain out enough fluid to allow me to breathe. I was walking with my father, who lives on a hillside, and is used to walking up hills, so he was moving rather fast. I had to increase my dosage so that I got enough oxygen to keep up with him. In other words I was taking pills to keep up with my father, and he is in his 80s !!!

Still, back home in England now. Flat lands and civilisation at last!

[Cleo]

No hills here unless you want to count the 14 foot coral ridge incline that I live on.

Just a day of work, gym, and errands planned for today.

[HowlingWulf]

That's a good story. Where are the pics? I want to see Wales people.

[MeatPounder]

Originally Posted by HowlingWulf

That's a good story. Where are the pics? I want to see Wales people.

(hint)
They look almost like Irish people

[Useless]

Originally Posted by HowlingWulf

That's a good story. Where are the pics? I want to see Wales people.

Catherine Zeta Jones, Tom Jones, Christian Bale, Rob Brydon

I took a half day off work for my son's doctor appointment, so here I am. How joyous!

[pc]

Reading ecchi story I felt like I was watching A. Hitchcock reading script of one of hes movies.
... or better yet Mel Brooks

[ecchi]

Originally Posted by pc

Reading ecchi story I felt like I was watching A. Hitchcock reading script of one of hes movies.
... or better yet Mel Brooks

I felt like I was in a Hitchcock movie some of the time, then in a Roger Corman movie, then in a Wes Craven movie, and occasionally in a 1970's European horror movie!

Originally Posted by HowlingWulf

That's a good story. Where are the pics? I want to see Wales people.

I didn't photograph any Welsh people, but here is a picture of a Welsh hill.



That was actually the view from my bedroom window. Pretty to look at when you wake up, but fucking knackering to climb!

[ecchi]

And here is a picture of a Welsh waterfall.

[ecchi]

And here is a Welsh castle (or the ruins thereof):



It was put up to protect them from the English, so we came and knocked it down for them (hence the fact that it is now just the ruins of a castle).

[ecchi]

And here are some more fucking Welsh hills:



Everywhere you fucking go in fucking Wales you have to go up a fucking hill. And when you turn round to go back home it is still fucking up hill. I have been back in nice flat England for three days and my feet still fucking ache.

Someone buy the Welsh Assembly (their government) a big fucking steam roller!

[Cleo]

Looks beautiful. Reminds me of the northeast USA or north California.

[JAI-LING]

You should make a journal and add pics with it. I like reading your stuff.
A tolerant man who can write is hard to find these days.

I was going to say area reminds me of Gettysburg, PA, and the general area as Maryland turns into Pennsylvania.

[tadpole]

Originally Posted by ecchi

Ever read "The Fall Of The House Of Usher"? Well it was a bit like the first few days in the castle in that book. Or - A European horror movie I saw once, where a doctor arrives to work at a mental asylum where (unknown to him) the lunatics have murdered the staff and taken their place.

Weird and disturbing.

I read it, and you are right, it was disturbing, it made you think 'shit, this could happen'!

Glad you enjoyed your visit. You should visit Ireland and Scotland next, be amusing to hear your take on them!

[ecchi]

Originally Posted by JAI-LING

You should make a journal and add pics with it. I like reading your stuff.
A tolerant man who can write is hard to find these days.

Thanks.

Originally Posted by tadpole

You should visit Ireland and Scotland next, be amusing to hear your take on them!

Went to Scotland when I was younger. The scenery is similar to Wales but more extreme (steeper hills, higher waterfalls, more mountains). I liked the country (very beautiful when you get out of the cities) but the Scots hate the English, so when we got outside the main tourist areas (where they are nice to the English, because they want their tourist cash) the atmosphere go a bit unpleasant.

My overriding memory of the country was their unhealthy way of cooking (add loads of fat to the recipe, then deep fry it regardless of what it is - They even cover candy bars with batter and deep fry them). I remember we stopped for a fish supper ("supper" is Scottish for "cover it in batter and serve it with loads of fried potatoes"). My sister, who is a vegetarian, ordered a pizza instead. And I'll never forget her look of horror when she saw them cooking the pizza by throwing it into the deep fat fryer.

[ecchi]

If you look at the last picture posted, then look at the background of the picture on the new cover of my book in this post: greenguysboard.com/board/showpost.php?p=535759&postcount=18 You will see that even when I was on holiday, I was still working!