Just a heads up

[stuveltje]

i wont be around, i have to many offline things to deal with, i am not happy with it either, but on this moment my fam needs me the most...i will check my emails and icq ones in awhile and sorry for all i deal with that i am late with things, please bare me i have a realy shitty offline time now...i hope to be back soon

[Jim]

Good luck Stu

[ponygirl]

sorry to hear that Stu

hope everything gets better for you soon

[terry]

Good luck. Cya soon.

[JackDaniel's]

Good luck dealing with your problems Stu ! I'll miss that Stu <---- style

[oaeguide]

good luck bro.

[stuveltje]

Originally Posted by oaeguide

good luck bro.

no bro, i am a woman

[stuveltje]

Originally Posted by JackDaniel's

Good luck dealing with your problems Stu ! I'll miss that Stu <---- style

i miss it too, i need to be the seriouse one now..........it takes al my energy...but i have to be there for my fam...., now all in my house are asleep gives me some time to get my mind on some other stuff, just for a short time, i am sooo tired , you know i cant explain it, but i never thought the pain your beloved ones have will hurt so much, you wanna take away that pain but you cant.............but you still try to make them feel better....you try and you cant, but its not only the pain you wanna take away its also the whole household you run.......i am just very busy...lets say it that way!..you know i am super mom well thats what my kids say about me

[SheepGuy]

Hang in there Stu!

[Fonz]

Sorry to hear that stuveltje. Good luck!

[Greenguy]

That's terrible. I'm sorry.

[Licker4U]

Hang in there Stu, it will get better.

[Cleo]

Hope everything works out for you my friend although I can't figure out from your thread what is troubling you..

[sue-fl]

Sorry Stu and I hope everything gets better very soon.

[digifan]

Hey hon, been there, done that and on both ends as care giving and a patient so i know how you feel. Try and hang in there... that's all I can say.

[stuveltje]

Thanks guys and girls))))) just an other heads up, someone (close friend of mine, a dutchie who helped me out last time when i got sick for some weeks) he will take over my emails and icq to check, so pleaseeee and this is for certain people who icq me and then get pissed because i dont answer and start to call me bad names there, DONT DO THAT, if you do, i will put you on my ignore list and your done with me!, ones all is over i will explain all, my friend knows what names to watch for me and dont sent me an icq sying "hi, are you there" or why dont you answer me, put your question or message there, that way he knows its important and he will notify me then i will try to answer them when i got the time or the energy.......! Thanks all and take care)))))))

[stuveltje]

i am still not ready to do the things i wanna do, but that will change the next weeks, tomorrow i am gonna make a desicion with the fam i am involved with, my sadness is changed into anger, on this moment i see my own fam falling apart , i wont lett that happen...no i wont.....no matter what is going on, on this moment i have an huge headeache, to many things going on, and to be honest my stupid dutch friend (who would check all on the net for me) wasnt a big help either, i can realy say this is the biggest clusterfuck i ever had in life....but dont think i am gone from bizz, because i am not, i will get back to fix all what i need to fix...and you know what, i miss you guys and girls Take care all, i hope to be back soon

[Jim]

Stu, there are a lot of people here that can be trusted to do the checking for you. All you have to do is ask.

[stuveltje]

Originally Posted by Jim

Stu, there are a lot of people here that can be trusted to do the checking for you. All you have to do is ask.

I know Jim i had already people i know from the net who i never met face to face offering to help me...you dont know how that makes me feel, it puts a big smile on my face, what i do hate is that people i do know in person for years in real life (so called friends) fuck up like that...my dutchie friend probably saw a option to watch free porn....moron, but dont worrie, i have told him that. Still thats a big point i like in this bizz, you have real friends here.. even i never have met them face to face. All will be fine with me, i just need some time and some drastic desicions and probably some fights with some inlaws, but then i will never walk away from a fight, specially not if its involved the benefit of my own hubby and kids. I will be back soon and thanks Jim)))))))

[stuveltje]

i wanna tell what is going on in my life, but is sucha fucking long story to write, on this moment i am very angry so i can say this: one important person is on the edge of dying..........but still doesnt die (i know it sound evil like i say it but hell this takes so much of my hubby and kids, i am that evil now that i think , hell die and quit all this shit, i know bad but you have to know what it does with my kids and hubby...then you know what i am talking about) then the stupid arguments with inlaws are going on......i think they are doing wrong, they think i am wrong, with that a close friend of mine got also in hospital but she is doing oke till now, this is a short story, but i am the fucking one to get the household going on, on this moment i am so pissed.....i am gonna change this all, i have had it, if i lett this go on....our fam will fall apart. Btw one big thanks for my mom, she is the only one who does understand me and will always be around for me, no matter how old i am....and i talked alot to her lately.......she is a real mom heay mom i loveeeeeeeeeee you for ever))))))))))) Ma je begrijpt er geen reet van wat ik in het english schrijf vandaar, ik hou van je))))))

[stuveltje]

i have to keep my mouth shut to 8 other brothers and sisters of my hubby about the facted that their dad can die every day.............i cant.......hell i wish i was on an island with nobody around..this world sucks.............there i said it, there is the big argument, the new wife of my fatherinlaw say, no mention it to thew other kids because they dont have contact with their dad, i think they have the right to know.............wahhhhhhhhhhh i wanna yell so loud..........and i am gonna tell , i cant keep this for myself, i think the kids need to know.......

[oldbrad]

Things like what your going thru can definately be the most trying. Everyone here wishes you the best and, as you know, will help you out whenever you need.

Good luck with the problems, eventually it will all clear up

[jennym]

It is their father.....tell them. Sucks big time that you are put in that situation.

[stuveltje]

Originally Posted by oldbrad

Things like what your going thru can definately be the most trying. Everyone here wishes you the best and, as you know, will help you out whenever you need.

Good luck with the problems, eventually it will all clear up

i know, oldbrad, i know.........but i still try to fix this my way....i wanna yell ...where is my easy life, just doing my thing and in summer like this time...fishing i try to joke around, on this moment my life is one huge mess, i know if i go my way, more mess will come, but then i always did my way, i have to go thru this, but for real i dont wanna just bugger others, but this is about my fam, my job as a mom is to protect them and take care of them , so i will dare all)) thanks for your support, maybe i sound like a weenie, but hell this board is the only place i can nag and yel and tell honeslty what is bugging me.....

[stuveltje]

Originally Posted by jennym

It is their father.....tell them. Sucks big time that you are put in that situation.

well thats my issue, i have contact with them, i would feel so bad not telling them that their dad is dying....i cant deal with that... i have to tell, i think even no contact, the kids have a right to know, thats its their choise to say i go visite him or not.....i also think its a bad choise of the new wife to say to me to not tell, hell i am here in that fam for 23 years she is around for 10 years, she doesnt know shit, she cant demand i wont tell ....i cant, now ofcourse you can say what about your hubby, my hubby feels already guilty he is the only one of the kids being there, but hell if the other kids dont know......i told hubbie this eve my thinking. he agreed, i am gonna tell tomorrow, lett the new wife hate me...i dont fucking care, i am longer around in that fam then her...his kids have the right to know