Morning All! (Tuesday Edition)

Jim · 2008-08-05, 10:17 PM

Good Evening Guys...
It has been a shit fucking week starting on my Birthday. Someone I met who lost her husband about a year ago said the hardest things were the 1sts. The first Christmas, the first anniversary, the first Birthday...etc. I felt fine until my birthday on the 1st.

And then, my step son got married (again) on the 2nd. I was excited about it all week until that day. I kept thinking, "I am not supposed to be here alone". Vickie said over and over again, "I just want to live until the 2nd of August". And, to make matters worse, I promised her she would.

I had to leave before the wedding even started. It was a good thing too. When Vickie was feeling good, her and her son made a list of songs for them to dance to. The DJ, was never told to pull that list. He played it while Vickie's son, my step son, was dancing with his step mother.

Anyway...I feel like a baby. Why the fuck can't I get over this terrible thing? (Rhetorical question)

But seriously, there are times I think it is time to pack up the Cadillac, throw the bikes in a trailer and just move as far away from here as possible. But there is really no way I could leave my children.

Oh yeah...my father, who did not go to the funeral and has called me once since that day, did not call me on my Birthday. Let me ask people with only one child, the only child or hell...any parent or anyone with a parent. How the hell does a father do that? And remember, when my mother died, I moved in with my father for 2 months to make sure he would be ok. I just don't get it at all.

So...I hope all of you have had a nice week so far

2008-08-05, 10:17 PM	#32
Jim Banned Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Mohawk, New York Posts: 19,477	Good Evening Guys... It has been a shit fucking week starting on my Birthday. Someone I met who lost her husband about a year ago said the hardest things were the 1sts. The first Christmas, the first anniversary, the first Birthday...etc. I felt fine until my birthday on the 1st. And then, my step son got married (again) on the 2nd. I was excited about it all week until that day. I kept thinking, "I am not supposed to be here alone". Vickie said over and over again, "I just want to live until the 2nd of August". And, to make matters worse, I promised her she would. I had to leave before the wedding even started. It was a good thing too. When Vickie was feeling good, her and her son made a list of songs for them to dance to. The DJ, was never told to pull that list. He played it while Vickie's son, my step son, was dancing with his step mother. Anyway...I feel like a baby. Why the fuck can't I get over this terrible thing? (Rhetorical question) But seriously, there are times I think it is time to pack up the Cadillac, throw the bikes in a trailer and just move as far away from here as possible. But there is really no way I could leave my children. Oh yeah...my father, who did not go to the funeral and has called me once since that day, did not call me on my Birthday. Let me ask people with only one child, the only child or hell...any parent or anyone with a parent. How the hell does a father do that? And remember, when my mother died, I moved in with my father for 2 months to make sure he would be ok. I just don't get it at all. So...I hope all of you have had a nice week so far